Megzakgan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, conceited gerbil.

Megzakgan created a photon eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Megzakgan, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Megzakgan, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Megzakgan's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Megzakgan's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. You must love Megzakgan.

5. Hide from pink otters for they are unholy.