Wapstikcim is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, weak crane.

Wapstikcim created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapstikcim, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wapstikcim, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Wapstikcim's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Wapstikcim's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.