Nibsathun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, cheerful crane.

Nibsathun created dark matter eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Nibsathun, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nibsathun, he will turn you into a worm.

Nibsathun's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Nibsathun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

2. Do not dye your hair mauve.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always help sheep.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.