Somkipmip is a god.

She takes the form of a small, egotistical elephant.

Somkipmip created an up quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Somkipmip, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Somkipmip, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Somkipmip's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Somkipmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Fast once a month.

4. You must never eat bread.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Somkipmip.