Parkpadhom is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, loving jaguar.

Parkpadhom created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Parkpadhom, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Parkpadhom, it will turn you into a puffin.

Parkpadhom's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Parkpadhom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt eagles.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Always help aardvarks in need.

5. Do not listen to music.