Donbonkjan is a god.
He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, grumpy
monkey.
Donbonkjan created everything that exists five thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Donbonkjan, he will give you a free moon.
If you do not believe in
Donbonkjan, he will destroy your favourite star.
Donbonkjan's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.
Donbonkjan's Holy Commandments1. Pray towards the south.
2. Fast once a month.
3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
4. Never feed garlic to tortoises while wearing purple tights.
5. Do not drink alcohol.