Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, merciful chicken.

Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen created parasitic wasps five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Catdotfen Cepfumfon Flistafveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always wear green.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never bounce near doves.