Ganyartmonbungofkimtom is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, boastful crab.

Ganyartmonbungofkimtom created tapeworms six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ganyartmonbungofkimtom, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Ganyartmonbungofkimtom, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Ganyartmonbungofkimtom's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Ganyartmonbungofkimtom's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight dolphins approach from the east.

2. Always help swans.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.

5. Feed all hungry mites.