Ripcedpig is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, witless fish.

Ripcedpig created a down quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ripcedpig, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Ripcedpig, he will turn you into a mouse.

Ripcedpig's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Ripcedpig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not dye your hair orange.

3. Hide from blue aardvarks for they are unholy.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Do not cook food in pots.