Sismabveen is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, caring goat.

Sismabveen created the cosmos two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sismabveen, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sismabveen, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Sismabveen's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Sismabveen's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never write about amino acids.

4. Worship no other gods but Sismabveen.

5. Never sing near dolphins.