Hakrullflow is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, sage unicorn.

Hakrullflow created matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hakrullflow, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Hakrullflow, he will turn you into a rock.

Hakrullflow's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Hakrullflow's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven turtles approach from the west.

2. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Hakrullflow on top of all buildings.

3. Always help sick badgers.

4. Always help mites in need.

5. Do not chop down trees.