Wabpanwod Genlakhog is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, dishonourable horse.

Wabpanwod Genlakhog created silver five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wabpanwod Genlakhog, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wabpanwod Genlakhog, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Wabpanwod Genlakhog's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Wabpanwod Genlakhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Wabpanwod Genlakhog.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Wabpanwod Genlakhog on top of all buildings.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.