Citdussdad is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, egotistical hamster.

Citdussdad created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Citdussdad, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Citdussdad, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Citdussdad's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Citdussdad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Citdussdad.

4. Do not speak about spinach.

5. Do not chop down trees.