Tailhuggeb is a god.
He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, narcissistic dove.
Tailhuggeb created matter four years ago.
If you believe in Tailhuggeb, he will look after you all your life.
If you do not believe in Tailhuggeb, he will ignore you.
Tailhuggeb's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.
Tailhuggeb's Holy Commandments1. Run away if five cats approach from the east.
2. You must pray to Tailhuggeb nine times a day.
3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.
4. Never run in holy places.
5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.