Bancettail Rawlipzag is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, impressive hamster.

Bancettail Rawlipzag created Mount Everest eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bancettail Rawlipzag, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bancettail Rawlipzag, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bancettail Rawlipzag's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Bancettail Rawlipzag's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near ants.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Bancettail Rawlipzag loves gulls, so they must be respected.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not shave your neck.