Tarpbopspag is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, ruthless alligator.

Tarpbopspag created the Sun eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarpbopspag, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tarpbopspag, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Tarpbopspag's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Tarpbopspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Always treat rats with great respect.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Tarpbopspag must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.