Bifpadjon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, ill-tempered gnu.

Bifpadjon created humanity two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifpadjon, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bifpadjon, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bifpadjon's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Bifpadjon's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dolphins.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Erect four platinum sculptures of Bifpadjon on top of important buildings.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Always wear yellow.