Dabquimlag is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, annoying grasshopper.

Dabquimlag created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dabquimlag, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dabquimlag, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dabquimlag's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Dabquimlag's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. You must pray to Dabquimlag six times a day.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Hide from turquoise capybaras for they are unholy.

5. Erect five titanium sculptures of Dabquimlag on top of important buildings.