Bidgoflarn is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, vain ferret.

Bidgoflarn created time and space six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bidgoflarn, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bidgoflarn, he will turn you into a worm.

Bidgoflarn's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Bidgoflarn's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine rats approach from the north.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

4. Badgers are not to be trusted.

5. Do not shave your face.