Dagbegpassafgodbum is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, selfish elephant.

Dagbegpassafgodbum created time and space seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dagbegpassafgodbum, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dagbegpassafgodbum, he will laugh at you.

Dagbegpassafgodbum's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Dagbegpassafgodbum's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from violet doves for they are unholy.

2. Never go into red rooms.

3. Do not hurt grasshopers.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never eat spinach.