Gonfutnurt is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, temperamental toad.

Gonfutnurt created the planet Jupiter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonfutnurt, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gonfutnurt, he will be mildly annoyed.

Gonfutnurt's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Gonfutnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three monkeys approach from the south.

2. Gonfutnurt loves capybaras, so they must be honoured.

3. Hide from yellow tapirs for they are unholy.

4. You must love Gonfutnurt.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.