Tabmutcindidbafzimyart is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, generous deer.

Tabmutcindidbafzimyart created water eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tabmutcindidbafzimyart, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tabmutcindidbafzimyart, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Tabmutcindidbafzimyart's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Tabmutcindidbafzimyart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Hide from purple ducks for they are unholy.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.