Nutthonhak is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, dishonest monkey.

Nutthonhak created snails nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Nutthonhak, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Nutthonhak, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Nutthonhak's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Nutthonhak's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five mites approach from the north.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not kill porpoises.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.