Dunbissgad is a god.

He takes the form of a large, kind hydra.

Dunbissgad created dark energy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dunbissgad, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dunbissgad, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Dunbissgad's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Dunbissgad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Put Dunbissgad first in all things.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.