Latbigneg is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, selfish gorilla.

Latbigneg created a Higgs boson nine million years ago.

If you believe in Latbigneg, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Latbigneg, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Latbigneg's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Latbigneg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Run away from cyan frogs, for they are unholy.