Nurnelbat is a god.

It takes the form of a small, strong swallow.

Nurnelbat created the Sol system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nurnelbat, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nurnelbat, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nurnelbat's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Nurnelbat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

2. Put Nurnelbat first in all things.

3. Erect three lead sculptures of Nurnelbat on top of important buildings.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.