Pangtunlip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, grumpy dryad.

Pangtunlip created bats nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pangtunlip, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Pangtunlip, she will send you a sign.

Pangtunlip's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Pangtunlip's Holy Commandments

1. Always help ants in need.

2. Always wear magenta.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

4. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.