Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, temperamental tortoise.

Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn created the Sun nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn, it will have a low opinion of you.

Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Always help monkeys in need.

3. Flanfuttam Dunnutgatwabwonfagbarn loves horses, so they must be honoured.

4. Never think ill of sick doves.

5. Never talk about planets.