Hapmisvil Veentafsaw is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, ruthless parrot.

Hapmisvil Veentafsaw created energy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hapmisvil Veentafsaw, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hapmisvil Veentafsaw, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Hapmisvil Veentafsaw's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Hapmisvil Veentafsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never wear gray shorts.