Shavkipnig is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, proud goat.

Shavkipnig created light eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavkipnig, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Shavkipnig, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Shavkipnig's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Shavkipnig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Shavkipnig's name in vain.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not dye your hair orange.

4. Never feed carrots to doves while wearing white corsets.

5. Do not speak about coconuts.