Jonwansan is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, prudent raccoon.

Jonwansan created the Cigar Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jonwansan, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Jonwansan, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Jonwansan's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Jonwansan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Never eat coconuts.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

5. Do not wear turquoise clothing.