Bessmancap is a god.

He takes the form of a small, ruthless beaver.

Bessmancap created an up quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bessmancap, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bessmancap, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bessmancap's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Bessmancap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill geese.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.

5. You must pray to Bessmancap five times a day.