Zestfodcut is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, grumpy raven.

Zestfodcut created bats eight million years ago.

If you believe in Zestfodcut, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Zestfodcut, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Zestfodcut's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Zestfodcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shoes.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Never bounce near badgers.

4. Never eat oranges.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.