Zendadkem is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, merciful wyrm.

Zendadkem created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zendadkem, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zendadkem, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Zendadkem's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Zendadkem's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five aardvarks approach from the east.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.