Tunloopflab is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, ill-tempered owl.

Tunloopflab created a strange quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tunloopflab, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tunloopflab, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Tunloopflab's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Tunloopflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Do not wear black clothing.

3. Do not speak about gooseberries.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.