Kangonvad is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, awe-inspiring raccoon.

Kangonvad created the solar system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Kangonvad, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Kangonvad, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Kangonvad's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Kangonvad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not eat coconuts.

3. You must love Kangonvad.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always help tortoises.