Bessziglog is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, wise turtle.

Bessziglog created snails nine million years ago.

If you believe in Bessziglog, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bessziglog, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Bessziglog's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Bessziglog's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Run away if eight swans approach from the south.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always help sick otters.