Dubcidarm is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, kind cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Dubcidarm created the Whirlpool Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Dubcidarm, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dubcidarm, she will turn you into a puffin.

Dubcidarm's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Dubcidarm's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from green snakes, for they are unholy.

2. Swans are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Put Dubcidarm first in all things.

5. Mice are not to be trusted.