Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, emotional duck.

Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig created a Higgs boson six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Nabflowbanxen Hogniglig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never feed lots of strawberries to seals while wearing black trousers.

3. Always wear turquoise.

4. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not make images of living things.