Cumfobzan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, grumpy yak.

Cumfobzan created the planet Jupiter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cumfobzan, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cumfobzan, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cumfobzan's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Cumfobzan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help swans.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Cumfobzan must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always make sure there are no manatees in a building before entering it.