Tadbumsashomtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a large, idiotic raccoon.

Tadbumsashomtetti created the solar system eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadbumsashomtetti, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tadbumsashomtetti, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Tadbumsashomtetti's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Tadbumsashomtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never laugh in the presence of voles.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Run away from indigo moths, for they are unholy.