Haspadbed is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, caring centipede.

Haspadbed created the Sol system nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Haspadbed, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Haspadbed, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Haspadbed's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Haspadbed's Holy Commandments

1. Learn seven new languages a year.

2. Never skip in the presence of manatees.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always pray immersed in water.