Flamjonhun is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, awesome grasshopper.

Flamjonhun created the Milkyway three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamjonhun, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flamjonhun, he will turn you into a frog.

Flamjonhun's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Flamjonhun's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always obey Flamjonhun's priests.