Yamhamvol is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, grumpy crab.

Yamhamvol created the Tadpole Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Yamhamvol, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Yamhamvol, she will turn you into a dog.

Yamhamvol's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Yamhamvol's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick foxes.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Erect nine copper sculptures of Yamhamvol on top of important buildings.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Never talk about fire.