Armomtyim is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, passionate troll.

Armomtyim created an up quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Armomtyim, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Armomtyim, she will turn you into a rat.

Armomtyim's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Armomtyim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Learn six new languages a year.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Armomtyim.

5. Do not kill frogs.