Larpomtwan is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, tranquil hamster.

Larpomtwan created matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larpomtwan, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Larpomtwan, he will come to you in dreams.

Larpomtwan's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Larpomtwan's Holy Commandments

1. Squirrels are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Run away from brown geese, for they are unholy.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not shave your chest.