Vidomthin is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, temperamental frog.

Vidomthin created snails five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidomthin, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Vidomthin, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Vidomthin's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Vidomthin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Never think ill of sick great tits.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vidomthin.

5. Put Vidomthin first in all things.