Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unthoughtful hippopotamus.

Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan created viruses three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan, he will not invite you to parties.

Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan's Holy Commandments

1. Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Put Shavyartcabhin Bossdumbassjan first in all things.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.