Afarmyarl is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, vain whale.

Afarmyarl created a down quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Afarmyarl, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Afarmyarl, he will turn you into a rock.

Afarmyarl's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Afarmyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Never feed lots of pineapples to porpoises while wearing blue boots.

5. Do not keep eight moths in a large pit.