Bitfarligcuss is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, contented alligator.

Bitfarligcuss created humanity three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitfarligcuss, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bitfarligcuss, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Bitfarligcuss' most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Bitfarligcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured shrews.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Bitfarligcuss.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.